I want to stick my p in your. b.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
