haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
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Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
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I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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