So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
