Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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