I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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