Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
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Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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