I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
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