Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
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