Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
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