She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
its liver damage thursday
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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