He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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