So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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