marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
