I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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