I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I'm always down for nudity.
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