His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
