I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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