No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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