Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize