Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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