i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
