You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I don't want my vagina anymore.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize