It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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