Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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