At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
