Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize