Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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