Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
