I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
