I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize