He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize