Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize