we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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