I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize