He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Duck Duck Cougar?
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize