she is the kim kardashian of front butts
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
