Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize