so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
