apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
