I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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