in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
