How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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