Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
In America we eat man semen.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
