so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I wish i was in the wii world.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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