wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
