Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
oh god was she eating orange peels again
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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