You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
