OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
