Heybabeimwearingurpanties
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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