the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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